Diary of a Happy Black Woman 2

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Diary of a happy black woman!


As you can see its day 12 of my 90 day challenge. How are you doing you ask? I am doing good. For this entry, I want to talk about temptation and fear of change. I have realised in the last 12 days that these two factors have had a huge influence in how I have felt so far.

So I’ll start with the concept of temptation. There have been two occasions whereby I was offered chocolate and a biscuit. Even though it was only one piece of chocolate and one biscuit, I knew I had to say no. Why?? If I had that one piece of chocolate, that would be it for me. I would end up buying myself a ‘good to share’ packet of snacks and end up eating it solo. Then I would fill myself up on the snacks and not want to eat my fruits in between my meals. To sum up, it would be game over-again!!

Since starting this challenge 12 days ago, I have tried cooking different meals. Meals which are so colourful with the beautiful selection of vegetables. So when I was offered the snacks, I thought to myself why did I get tempted to buy so much chocolate and biscuits in the past. The colours of these foods look more dark and dull to me in comparison to my new found variety of colourful fruits. I didn’t and still don’t understand why I was so attracted to chocolate so much when the effects were so short lived. In comparison, my new found attraction for fruits and veggies seem to have shown lasting effects already. I certainly feel like I am more positive and energised – ready to face each day head on!! When I eat a lot of chocolate and unhealthy snacks often, I would feel so tired and run down. I did not have energy to do my stretches at all. I just could not be bothered really.

Don’t get me wrong, I go into the supermarket and stare at these snacks for slightly longer than I probably should. I know I still have a way to go before I can just walk past without taking deep breaths. So to tackle my temptations, I just need to remember how good my new changes have made me feel already and how I want to feel (internally and on the outside) after the 90 day challenge.

Upon reflection, I have felt that temptation can relate to fear of change. I have wanted to change my lifestyle for a while but a situation would happen and I would go back to the same routine (have a packet of chocolate). Chocolate was like my security blanket-always available when I needed it (and sometimes on offer too!). Deep down, I think I used to fear change. Change can be easy, as its like fear of the unknown. Change is like making a statement – ‘I am leaving my security and taking a risk’. Fear is not knowing the outcome of the change-which can be so scary. So I had a think during this challenge and asked myself how am I going to deal with this fear?? For the answer, I used the same solution, I applied when setting up the business with Rosie. If I didn’t take this risk and make such a change, what would be my other option? In this case, it would be to continue spending money almost daily on unhealthy snacks, feel tired, worn out, low energy, negative outlook to life and simply moody at times. So basically, at this point of time, there is no other option. I need to make my change and I need to do it now!

See you next week!
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